Michelangelo: Oh, just the regular stuff: flies, stink bugs... It was a joke.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990 movie)
Although Passover ended four days before I began typing this, both of the anecdotes in this story relate to things that I did today because of the holiday.One is fairly pleasant, the other less so. Let's start with the unpleasant one.
Why I didn't get the breakfast I wanted this morning, and vowed to continue to harm the environment just a little
I woke up hungry this morning. That's a little unusual for me; normally a glass of orange juice is all I really need. This is good, especially because I'm not at my best in the morning, and may not be up to the difficulties of actually cooking.
While I was thinking of what to make without much work, I saw we had a handful of trail mix left over from Passover. As I think I mentioned, I bought a lot of fruit and nuts before the holiday, in an attempt to have something tasty around. So I thought that oatmeal, with a handful of nuts, raisins and dried cranberries, would certainly qualify as easy and tasty.
Had I made the oatmeal, this is the recipe I would have followed:
1/2 cup oatmeal
1 cup water
handful of trail mix
Step 1) Put everything in bowl. Put bowl in microwave for about 2 1/2 minutes.
Step 2) Eat
However, as I went to get the first ingredient, I could see a cricket sitting in the oats. It wasn't the largest one I've ever seen, but it was almost an inch long. The cricket seemed to look at me, as if to say "Do you mind? I have to finish this half-full box, and I'm the only one in it." I obliged Jiminy's non-musical cousin, putting him (or her, I don't know how you tell a cricket's gender, and don't really care) and the oats in the garbage can.
How did the cricket get into the oats? Passover.
During the holiday, we put all our hometz -- food which isn't permitted during those eight days -- in the basement. Which, like most basements, has some insects. In this case, the oatmeal obviously wasn't well sealed, and an insect got in. Since I didn't want to eat something filled with cricket poop, it had to go.
In a related note, two ladies came by the house today as part of Project Porchlight. They were handing out energy-efficient light bulbs and asking people to take steps to make the planet a little greener. But when I saw the cricket, my first thought was "I'm glad I add to the landfills during Passover."
Years ago, my sister found a bug in one of the glasses we use for the holiday. Much like hometz is stored downstairs during those eight days, the equipment for Passover is stored there the other 357. It gives bugs plenty of time to crawl in there. Since then, I've been using paper cups during the holiday. I know that it's possible to wash the glasses in really hot water, to make sure they're clean, but I still have the mental image that generations of spiders might have lived in the glass I'm drinking from, and it's not a mental image I want.
Maybe in 2011 I'll try to use the same disposable cup for more than one meal or snack before throwing it away. At least, that's what I'll tell myself now when I'm thinking about the environment. I'm sure I'll forget before then.
Date, apricot and almond cake recipe
As I said above, I bought a lot of dried fruit and nuts during the holiday, and since I now have real bread and other foods to eat, they're less appealing as a snack. Plus, they're really crowding the shelves.
So I turned some dates, apricots and almonds into a cake. It's okay, but not awesome.
I adapted a recipe from a book "Jewish Holiday Cakes," by Hana Shaulov. I wonder if it suffers from some translation issues. The only liquid it called for were eggs and oil -- no water, no juice, no milk. With 3 cups of flour, and lots of dates, nuts and apricots, there didn't seem to be much to bind it together. After I'd mixed the egg yolks, oil and dry ingredients together, I thought the cake was destined for failure. It didn't resemble a batter as much as a crumble. It was only when I stirred in part of the beaten egg whites (prior to folding) that it began to resemble an actual batter. But that batter was so dense that the rest of the whites served only to turn if from a super dense batter to a relatively dense batter. The didn't give it the fluffiness I think egg whites should if I go through all the trouble to beat them. If I ever make this recipe again, I'm throwing in half a cup of apple or orange juice, or maybe brandy.
The result I wound up with is flavorful, but dry.
Also, if anyone reading this is ever shopping with me when I buy whole almond, and there's a possibility I'll use those nuts for cooking, for the love of all that is holy, please remind me to buy blanched almonds. Getting the skin off those suckers is such a pain in the ass, even if they make it look relatively effortless on cooking shows and recipe websites. The skin just does not want to come off some of them, no matter how hard you try. Or worse, half the skin comes off effortlessly, and the other bits just won't let go, and you keep wondering if you did something wrong, even though the next almond gives you no trouble at all. (The recipe called for chopped almonds. I don't mind chopping them; in fact, I like the texture.)
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